What in the world is going on? What did I see on Sunday? Was that a dream? Was it the Matrix glitching the Tannehill algorithm, but this time reloading with a younger avatar? I'm still losing my mind over here at the performance we witnessed from Will Levis, almost like a kid at Christmas with a shiny new toy, but it's still my job to bring you the cold, hard facts. So grab a "Levis Latte" (Shout out TTBN) and tune in to this week's Mayo-induced coma edition of "The Good, The Bad & The WTFugly.
THE GOOD
BIG WILLY STYLE HAS ENTERED THE CHAT
What a debut for the Mayo Man, AKA Big Willy, AKA Billie Jeans, as he racked up 239 yards and four touchdowns. (We're still looking for that nickname, y'all.) I know people are trying to draw Marcus Mediocre comparisons, but what if I told you three of the 'Flyin' Hawaiian's' touchdowns went for a combined 17 total yards, while Levis had three touchdowns alone accounting for 112 total yards. Not to mention, they were three of the ten longest touchdown passes across the entire NFL in the first 8 weeks of the season. Not bad for his first official NFL start.
With Levis already named the starter for this week's contest against the Pittsburgh Steelers, can he cement himself as the leading man for the rest of the season's NFL script? Be sure to tune in this Thursday to find out. All hail Lord Mayonnaise... yeah, that one definitely doesn't work.
DHOP?? MORE LIKE THREE HOP
Ladies and gentlemen, they call him Nuk, and he's a real problem. Four catches, 128 yards, three touchdowns. Yeah... you remember that guy everyone said was washed up, like yesterday's underwear? I guess my definition of 'washed' differs from theirs. Anyway, the wily veteran told the rookie to trust him to make the plays, and boy, did he ever make them. He looked like a young Brett Favre crossed with Genghis Khan, slinging that ball around with no regard for humanity, knowing he had a future Hall of Fame wide receiver waiting for him in the secondary. All those who said D-Hop was 'washed' are looking like a bus-load of bozos as we speak.
THE AMAZING AZEEZ AL-SHAAIR
I've been saying it every week in this column, but this man has been a home run free-agent signing for Ran. I'm pretty sure he moonlights as a superhero. With 11 total tackles on Sunday, this now brings his tally to 73 for the year, which ranks 9th overall in the NFL. If you want to compete in the NFL, you have to be a dog. This man is the true definition of a dog. He's a tackling machine that was waiting for his time to shine in sunny San Fran. The problem was that he had two All-Pro linebackers blocking his path. Averaging ten tackles a game and already commanding the attention of the locker room, Al-Shaair has been the impact player we've hoped many would be who have come before him. Hallelujah!
GIVE NO. 22 TWENTY PLUS EVERY GAME PLEASE
Welcome, class, to Titan Up 101. Today's lesson will be short and sweet. In all of the Titans' losses this season, Derrick Henry has been given less than 20 carries. In all of the Titans' wins this season, Derrick Henry has been given more than 20 carries.
If you all would please turn to page 22 in your text books to follow along:
A: Derrick Henry < 20 carries = Titans L
B: Derrick Henry > 20 carries = Titans W
If a train is traveling South bound at 200 MPH, but collides with Derrick Henry who stiff arms it to veer off course at 250 MPH, while Derrick gets 25 carries on the day, will the Titans win or lose? Any questions? ok, great. Class dismissed.
PASS PROTECTION
Will Levis was hit 11 times on Sunday but only sacked twice, which is pretty incredible to think about. Much of it had to do with the fact that Levis, at this point, is way more mobile than Tannehill and that he was getting the ball out of there faster than Antonio Brown at halftime of a Bucs game. While Andre Dilliard has been nothing short of pathetic, Daniel Brunskill has been a breath of fresh air as of late, and NPT getting into the mix is beginning to iron out some wrinkles. Depending on how things play out this week in Pittsburgh, our offensive line may be turning a corner just in time for the second half of the season... or they could crash and burn and continue to struggle because, hey, why not?
THE BAD
THE QB CAROUSEL
Two quarterbacks rarely work in college, so why are we experimenting here in Tennessee? No offense to Malik, but the book report that Will Levis turned in on Sunday secured the fact that you aren't getting the starting job, ever... unless someone gets hurt, but we're not going to manifest that right now... wait, sh*t... we just did. Anyway, Willis is a skilled athlete with some intangibles that you can't teach: speed, strength. Surely, we can find a role for him as a pass catcher, utility player, gadget guy, goal line wildcat, or something if they want to keep him around because, from all reports, everyone loves the kid. But this isn't a popularity contest or a participation trophy; it's about the product you put on the field on Sundays.
SLIPPIN' CHIGGY WITH IT
Did my man Chig have his hands surgically replaced with bricks this offseason? Because I've seen at least 10 wide-open passes slip through his mitts, three of which could have gone for touchdowns. If this were backyard football in my neighborhood, he would have already been sent home to do his homework. I know he's young and has a lot of football left in his career, but with expectations through the roof, his performance this season has been nothing short of underwhelming. I'm trying to get 'Chiggy with it, my man, so let's get back to moving those chains.
COACHING DECISIONS
Okay, I'm not an NFL coach, even though we all agree I should be. I mean, pretty much every single idea I have comes to fruition while people like Bill Belichick get to bask in the glory. But when you have a young QB getting hot, zipping the ball around the field like a scud missile, it's typically not a good idea to pull him and throw in another young player trying to find his way. What happened, you ask? Well, it's funny because we immediately turned the ball over and gave the Falcons a free field goal. That's two games in a row we've turned the ball over in the red zone with a bonehead play, handing our opponent free points. That's not how you win football games.
THE WTFUGLY??!!
BOO BIRDS FLOCKING TO NISSAN STADIUM
Look, this time of year, Falcons sometimes flock to Nissan Stadium. But last time I checked, Boo Birds typically don't leave Philadelphia unless they owe someone money or are evading a warrant. Anyway, as for the boos, I know that most folks were booing the decision to take Levis out at that moment, which I agree was ridiculous and confusing. But the way things transpired wasn't a good look for Titans fans. We aren't Philly. We don't boo our players, no matter their performance or the outcome of the game. Plus, we angered Big Jeff, and unless you're blind, he's not the type of guy you want to piss off. He's like a mix between Thanos and Lawrence Taylor, without the crack-smoking, of course. Taylor, that is... I'm not sure about Thanos.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
TI is the brains behind the "Titans Idiot Nation" and an avid sports fanatic and pop culture enthusiast who is unhealthily obsessed with football, especially the NFL. When he's not yelling at his TV, he enjoys running, spending time with his family and of course, yelling at his TV.Check Out Some Other Stories From Titans Idiot Nation
